Godrays

Godrays over the I-40.

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Fowl

Memphis Pyramid.JPGOkay, look, I get the whole Memphis/Egypt connection, but the monstrous Bass Pro Shop Pyramid stands out as painfully garish in a town which already celebrates the garish.  I fled west across the Mississippi River to get away from it.

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Sun

Made a quick pilgrimage to Sun Studio before leaving town.

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Taste

Considering the size of the Graceland museum complex across the street, I was struck by the modest size of the mansion itself.

Per usual, America has it’s priorities straight.Each visitor is loaned a heavily-rubberized iPad with a neck strap which has a virtual tour (narrated by John Stamos, naturally) as you physically tour the mansion.Elvis had all the money in the world.  But you can’t buy taste.The den immediately made me think of Pin’s Mom’s house in Brick…whereas the three televisions in the basement cocktail lounge made me think of Ozymandias‘s bank of monitors in Watchmen.The cringing continued.Wood paneling?Green carpet on the hallway walls and ceiling?  This dude has been held up as a style icon for more than half a century!In the backyard, in the office where Elvis’s father Vernon conducted business, we transition from kitsch to banality.I found his horse enclosure unexpectedly endearing.  He was just a country boy, at a fundamental level.The mansion as seen from the backyard.Only with these invoices did it come into focus just how much money he had spent on all his gaudy furnishings.I fully expected Elvis to have a wallet that said “Bad Motherfucker” on it.Elvis was obsessed with law enforcement.They had on display Elvis’s infamous Bureau of Narcotics and Dangerous Drugs badge that he finagled from President Nixon!Finally in the backyard, we transition from the banal to the outlandish.The dude built a gym with a racquetball court.The Graceland pool was no bigger than any of thousands of others in backyards throughout Camelot Era suburbia.Finally, at the end of the tour, is the “Mediation Garden”……which is the gravesite.I stood before Elvis’s grave and paid homage, just like U2 and Spın̈al Tap before me.

“Too much fucking perspective.”

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Liminal

In a sleepy corner of the Graceland museum complex, I found myself in a convention hall-sized room with an audience-worth of chairs set up facing a screen at one end.  There wasn’t a single person there.  The movie played to the empty seats, echoing in the cavernous chamber.

It was unnerving.

Made me think of the concept of “liminal spaces” which are places in transition that often have an unnerving quality because they seem out of place or slightly “wrong” somehow.  Like an empty airport late in the wee hours of the morning.  Or your friend’s house at night when everyone is asleep.  Or a deserted intersection in Twin Peaks with the stoplight transitioning from one color to the next with no traffic in sight.

Liminal spaces are pregnant with dread.

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Filmography

I guess I never grokked how many films Elvis starred in.  They range from the famous……to the plausible-but-silly-sounding……to the are-you-fucking-kidding-me-that-has-got-to-be-a-joke-right?

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King

Visited Graceland.  Across the street from the mansion itself is a museum complex celebrating Elvis’s music career, film career, car collection, and plane collection.  And, no, despite the bombardment of Elvis songs from every direction, I couldn’t get Paul Simon out of my head.In a section devoted to his international celebrity, discovered that his name in Chinese is 猫王 (Māo Wáng, literally “Cat King”.)So strange to think about an era where you would need a map to know the range of a radio tower in order to know how far & where you were broadcasting.Seeing this television in the archives, a certain Itchy & Scratch cartoon suddenly made sense.I’m starting a rumor that no only is Elvis alive, but he’s actually a wildly successful Mary Kay representative.

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Studio

My cousin Sean just moved to Nashville a couple months ago.  He’s created a fantastic studio space in the attic of the place he and his friend are renting.  Listened to some of his stuff and he’s doing great engineering work.  Plus, it warms my heart to see my old Strat on his guitar rack.

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Clouds

Like Missionary Ridge, Lookout Mountain is now also a tony residential neighborhood.  Over the years, important battles were fought here against the Indians and during the Revolutionary War.  But during the Chattanooga Campaign it was firmly in the hands of the Confederacy.  The Union storming of the mountain became known as “The Battle Above the Clouds”.  I can’t imagine fighting my way up the steep sides of this mountain.  It’s just inconceivable.

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Knob

Commanding from Orchard Knob in the middle of Chattanooga, Ulysses S. Grant could see both Missionary Ridge to the east and Lookout Mountain to the southwest.

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Knell

Missionary Ridge (not to be confused with Seminary Ridge in Gettysburg) is now a tony residential neighborhood looking down on Chattanooga from the east.  The Confederacy held the high ground.My man George Henry Thomas’s men were ordered by Grant to take the rifle pits at the foot of the steep hill, but spurred on by the memory of their loss at Chickamauga, they continued on, up and over the hill, and overran the Confederate positions.  The rebels fled.This was the command post that General Braxton abandoned.  One of the Confederate officers was heard to remark that the loss at Missionary Ridge was the “death knell of the Confederacy”.

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Rock

Visited the Chickamauga and Chattanooga National Military Park which straddles the Tennessee/Georgia border. As a railroad hub, Chattanooga was critical for the Union to take before it could invade the Deep South and, they hoped, end the war.Named after the creek that runs through the area……the Battle of Chickamauga was a tactical disaster for the Union caused by miscommunication.One of my other favorite figures of the Civil War, Major General George Henry Thomas, held the Confederacy back here at Snodgrass Hill which allowed the Union troops to retreat to Chattanooga and which prevented the debacle from becoming a rout.Thomas’s valor earned him the nickname “The Rock of Chickamauga”.

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Pickle

As I had expected, the Shoney’s staff was unamused by my repeated Rick & Morty references.  But, hey, this trip hasn’t been an entire waste of time.  Job opportunity!

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Sampler

Ate dinner at a place called Sticky Fingers that claimed to be the best BBQ ribs in Chattanooga.  I ordered the sampler so I could try the dry rub, spicy, sweet, and regular.  Couldn’t finish them all in one sitting.  (I’ve settled on the dry rub as my favorite, going forward.)

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Hello

After leaving the Great Smokey Mountains and then inching my way through the the horrible Souther fried tourist trap of Gatlinburg, I rounded a corner in Pigeon Forge and stumbled on Dollywood!  Seems like it’s the kind of place people would be more likely to make a pilgrimage to rather than merely stumble upon.

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