Achievement

Unlocked several achievements just now:

• Broke my longest dry spell for not seeing a movie in a theater since I was, I don’t know, in junior high, probably?
• Saw my first movie here in China.
• Specifically, saw my first Jackie Chan movie here in China.

Didn’t know anything about Dragon Blade going into it except that it was in 3D, had a terrible title, and some of the oddest casting since Billy Connolly & Xzibit showed up in the second X-Files movie.

Maybe it’s because I’ve always considered John Cusack a role model and Jackie Chan my hero, but — despite all its absurdities & flaws — I liked this movie.

Other than a painfully unnecessary frame, it takes place two thousand years ago.  Jackie Chan is head of an elite Silk Road Protection Squad which tries to keep peace between the various warring tribes along the route.  (Their motto is “turn foes to friends”.)  John Cusack leads a Roman legion, fleeing east to protect a young, blinded boy from his usurping, murderous uncle played by Adrien Brody.  Cue cross-cultural fighting, bonding, teaming up, and a Shakespearean body count.

It’s pure melodrama — and I mean that literally, as the Romans sing a rousing anthem and then Jackie Chan sings another — but melodrama isn’t always a bad thing.

And this isn’t Cusack in his put-upon-everyman mode, but in his asskicking Grosse Pointe Blank mode.  He also gets to say David-bait lines like, “I need food & water for my men, medicine for a sick boy…and a place to think.”